Posts Tagged ‘motherhood’

The other day I wanted to ask my almost 12-year old son a question.

Instead of just doing the thing that the experts tell you that you should do, which would be to try to find him and look at him full in the face in order to communicate with him more effectively, I did what most parents do. I yelled my question from where I was in the office to wherever he was in the house thinking he would hear me.

“Here I am,” yelled my son from the other room after I’d called him for the umpteenth millionth time. In exasperation after there was no response to my question, I needed to know if he was even within earshot. I needed to know if he was there. So, I said, very loudly mind you, “Where are you?”

Now I don’t want to give you the wrong idea that we live in a large house where it is easy to not hear someone. No, my son and I live in a two bedroom, two bath home that is very small. In fact, I often refer to it affectionately as my little shoebox. So, the fact that I had to find out where he was in it was somewhat comical considering I usually know where my cat is at all times.

But my son, he’s a different story altogether. He’s always moving around, seemingly never in the same place for more than a second or two. In my mind, he never seems close by at all, but whenever he yells back “Here I am”(this little scenario happens more frequently than I would like to admit) inevitably he is much closer than I ever expect. Usually just around the corner.

Isn’t this usually how it feels with God? He always seems like He’s moving around, and fast too, like we just can’t get a grip on where He is only to find that He’s been right in the mix, next to us the whole time saying “Here I Am”.

“Therefore My people will know My name; therefore they will know on that day that I am He who says: Here I am.”     Isaiah 52:6

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Aging is a funny old thing as my grandmother used to say. And really, it is. What’s even stranger is seeing people you love age.

During the summer holidays my parents usually come out for my son’s birthday and stay for an open-ended visit. This could mean four weeks to three months. The length of their visit depends on what’s going on in all of our lives and how long we can live in my little shoebox together.

Because I only see them once or twice a year, the changes that they are going through as they age are very noticable. They don’t creep up on me like they would if I saw them often, instead they hit me over the head like a 2×4.

The funny thing about parents and a child’s memory of them – at least my memory of  them – is that they sit in the photo frame of my mind at their very best stage of life.

My mom has always been a fun-loving, laughing woman who didn’t let you get away with much. Yet, at times gave my brother and I a really long rope. My memories of her swirl around a small blond woman with laughing grey/green eyes who twinkled when she talked and could get up to mischief in a second.

My dad was a sterner figure who always reminded me of someone who would have done well in the Victorian era. He could do anything and my memories of him are chock full of him fixing and making pretty much everything and anything from the car, to the yard – pouring cement ( with my Mom laughing next to him as they worked the cement mixer together) to putting in the yard. He could do just about anything.

Now they are a little older, they aren’t pouring cement or getting up to so much mischief. They are changing just like I am. Sometimes these changes are difficult to see, while other are a joy.

Just the other morning I saw something that I don’t remember seeing before, my mom sitting quietly, her large print Bible open in front of her as she read God’s Word. She does this everyday now. I remember that she did Bible studies when I was young, but I don’t recall seeing her read His Word everyday, not like she does now.

This could be my own faulty memory starting to fitz out with age, or it could be a very concrete reminder that no matter what our age or circumstance, God is always with us. We just need to take the time to remember He’s there.

“I will be the same until your old age, and I will bear you up when you turn gray.”

Isaiah 46:4a

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